This is what parenting is all about, being squashed on a school bench at the back of a hot, dark and very loud school hall, surrounded by hyperactive small people and listening to cheesy pop music.
This is my new ‘social life’ and I have to come to terms with the loss of my old one and…‘Let it go’
** Checklist for any school discos **
A Crazy DJ– CHECKWho not only plays music but interacts with the children too, so a DJ/Kids entertainer. He is responsible for controlling all the children, whilst being able to dance and sing along to all the songs! He must be on big bucks to do that job!
Girl’s on one half of the room and boys the other– CHECKIn a dance / sing along type battle. Girl’s v Boys battles never end well, in my experience!
Frozen craziness – CHECKThe world has gone Frozen crazy, and so has the school disco’s!
My daughter is no exception she went in the Elsa dress, the hair in a side plait, the jewellery and of course the glittering eyes! Identical to all the other girls in the school. Followed by all the Frozen songs, sung word for word by all the children whilst doing the big dramatic arm movements……Oh dearie me!
Smoothies - CHECKCartons of juice have been replaced with healthy alternatives, obviously at twice the price! No sugar and no fun, not at all party like.
Tears – CHECKThere is always tears, this can range from anything small, like not liking the song to a major incident like being too hot (perhaps as a result of the smoothies not hydrating them enough).
Boys sliding across the school hall – CHECKI can’t figure out why they do this, but I think perhaps it’s a male ego thing and an alternative to dancing.
Miserable teachers – CHECKWho are as equally unhappier about having to be there as us parents, but have to at least pretend to be enjoying it. They have to be on constant alert to stop any boys sliding and prevent all possible injuries from occurring due to the strict health and safety legislations. I do feel for the teachers who have spent a whole 10 hours with the children, they must too need the sugar too that has now been replaced by the healthy smoothies!! However, I think I would need vodka, not sugar to do their job.
Tired and irritable children - CHECKIt’s late and after all the antics it’s now time to take you’re over excited, sweaty and worn out child home and in return they will give you major tantrums before bed….Oh the joys!!
I can’t control my excitement for the next school disco…….!!
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